by Natasha Botkin
How many times, have you written a positive affirmation, meditated, tried, cried, pleaded, begged only to seem to return to something that just did not make sense. It may not be what you think, an unforeseen force, that needs to be released. I smile, as I hear some who read this, oh I will do this myself, I’ll turn to…just know that you are not alone and do not have to do this alone.
I will begin the blog post, with a grateful thank you to my paternal grandmother. In life, we had tiffs and riffs, in death, she has been a huge advocate. Her latest moment of love was a serious unforeseen force that needed to be released. This does not belong to me. It belongs to others and their discord unwelcome.
Often times, one may feel as why does this keep happening. I am trying so hard to do it right.
You see, I am a powerful manifestor in a way of magical alchemy. One day I thought I’d love that, hmm how can this be achieved and poof here it was. Yet, as soon as it is here, this seems to leave. What am I discussing: money. I am always divinely provided for and have had many opportunities to move in a different direction. I had much more and lost it all. Having to reinvent myself. Rocking the foundation and to begin to build anew. Unfortunately, it has always felt like a weight on my shoulders. Even when I had a comfortable bank account, there was something, almost a self-fulfilling prophecy that it will go, so I would hold on tight to my bag. Me shaking my head, why, what is happening.
I hear the energies of ancients, of my grandparents arguing. The vision comes forth, I sit and watch this screen, as if I am watching a movie. My paternal grandmother, kindly nudging everyone, “This was our pain to bear, not hers. Let her go, she has much to do.”
I saw me, all the money that wants to come to me, and then me dragging the bag, what I will call the family’s financial woe is me bag. Oh my goodness there is a hole in my bag, the bills wafting in the wind and then a wall or rather a block, I am trying to peer over the wall to see. Youhoo, can anyone hear me, please help me, I do not know what to do. Why does this keep repeating….
Images of those who came before me, the financial worries of loss, hide it, so no one will know what we have, don’t let go, we cannot go hungry again, the list goes on and on. What I am seeing is the financial money block that I did not “see.” No matter how many affirmations, this would not relent, no matter the mindset, the unforeseen forces held tight.
My paternal grandmother pleading, “Let her go, this is our pain, our worries, our fears; she does not need this, let her be set free from our madness.”
The vision so strong, it moving in a different manner. Me clearing, releasing that which is not mine. Me smiling, feeling lighter, picking up a bag, where shall I take this all of my monies. I see a door opening for me. With the family ties releasing, it is now up to me to do what’s best for me. I can see the shining glimmer of hope, “the future’s so bright I gotta wear shades.”
This was a family financial woes and feelings of money. A financial block that kept me from truly achieving everything I’ve dreamt. As my dear grandmother stated, this does not belong to me. I am not them, they are not me. One does not need to be saddled with the ideas that are not theirs. Go forth and be the best, truest, you that, you can be!!
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Much Love, Much Light and Magical Blessings,