Nobodys’ Thinking About You

By Natasha Botkin 

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A-ha, hopefully the title caught your eye.  No, this is not a put down about you or how much you are unloved.  Rather this is a moment of “nobody was ever thinking about you, anyhow.” – Elizabeth Gilbert quote of an unknown individual.  

Where did this stem from? The other day while I am walking along, my higher self and I are internally conversing, when I hear, “Goodness, just how old are you?” A lady had chosen in this moment, to decipher my wardrobe, but that is hindsight to her next comment, “I love when a woman has balls!”  

My response was, “Okay, you have my attention, what gives?” Upon which she repsonds, You are fearless to walk along here dressed in this manner-everyone else is dressed in workout gear.” I look at my clothing, I have on a simple red dress, gray tights, black knee high boots and my favorite brown cloak; in fact I look down right cute.  Or maybe that is what she was referring, too.  We continue to converse about how so many people are afraid to just be themselves; they worry so much about what others may say or do.  So, I ask, “Why did you ask my age?”  She responds with, “Darling, you have an air of an old soul, and yet I feel a heart of a child, you must really confuse people.”  I chuckle, “You have no idea!” 

We parted from our conversation, and my higher self chimes in, “See sweet girl, you know what you must do- now go forth with the fearlessness that you hold within.” 

I leave you with, be you: Dance as if no one is watching, jump in those puddles, have fun; because in truth “nobody was thinking about you.” 

Much Love, Much Light and Magical Blessings, 

Natasha 

 

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Begin Anew

by Natasha Botkin 

Generally my heart’s energy purrs like a well-oiled motor, and then when it turns into a massive generator, I really perk up.  One thing that resonates with me through divine channels is “that was then and this is now; wipe the slate clean.” -Amel  

This began days before my latest moments with my BeLoved Twinflame.  A beautiful moment of pure joy and love, both of us leaving behind the old.  Leaving behind the old to begin anew.  One point me making a statement, and he cleverly saying “tsk, tsk, ‘that was then and this is now,’” in a quite playful manner.

Did this appear for him, for me, for we, for us?  Begin anew.  The definition to anew isNatasha (Princess) and Roy (Knight) to begin in a new, positive way.  All of this just days before the Black Super New Moon.  As my BeLoved made this statement, my heart generator began to hum, me placing my hand near my heart and shining my love and light to him.  “Wipe the slate clean, begin anew, love anew dear Tru, for I will always love you.” -Amel

No matter the what, may you be able to wipe the slate clean.  May you be able to begin anew.

Over and over this has resonated through me.  It is not only our love that is anew; other ways of thinking, being are anew.  The message that Amel brings forth is, “Dear ones wipe your slate clean, listen to your heart and dance like no one is watching. Your dance may be individual or with a partner, all in all may your heart fill anew with love.  Dance, sing, love.”-Amel 

Much Love and Light

Magical Blessings, Natasha

The Past of One’s Mistakes Can Herald Through the Times….Release dear one

By Natasha Botkin

Natasha (Princess) and Roy (Knight)Recently, I was discussing with another how my past lives keep showing up.  Sometimes one at a time, sometimes many all at once.  One thing is for sure, the divine has me on overdrive and there are days where keeping up with human experiences are beyond overwhelming.

A week ago, I was underneath not one, but two different sinks to clear blocked drains.  As I am attempting to put the pipes back together a sob commences and the feeling of get ready shines through.  Oh no, water means deep emotions and how deep is this going to go.  It is not like we are ever given a definitive releasing map. It is, just the know that something is going to happen, and the happening will arise as needed.

How deep did this go.  Centuries back, back to when all of the troubles began for me and my twin flame. One thing happened which led my BeLoved to not act like himself and this led me to not act like myself.  I cannot say why I did not confess my sins (not really a sin–rather a massive mistake).  Instead, I have been trying correct this mistake over and over. My loving heart, shamed, how could I have allowed this to happen: I am of love.  It is almost like the movie “Groundhog Day,” except instead of reliving one particular moment.  Mine catapulted into lifetime after lifetime, trying so hard to hide this enormous mistake from my BeLoved, maybe this time, I can correct it, and thus, only to be heralded to untimely death after death.

Now, when I mention how deep–Oh it was deeper than the depths of most oceans.  Funny part about all of this, because I have to allocate the humor to something so large, is that my BeLoved in this lifetime loves to scuba dive.  One thing he taught me was no matter how intense the storm is at or near the surface, if you go down x amount of feet; yep, I have forgotten the exact amount, and yes he is spiritually smiling, as how am I ever going to learn to scuba dive, if I cannot recall the depth meters. The water will be calm X amount of feet down.

So when for the fourth time in a week, 2 clogged pipes, a clogged garbage disposal and a flooded basement. I decided it was time to give my BeLoved’s idea a whirl.  You see, my body reacted to all of this in a way that no longer serves me.  Anger exuded from me, and this left me in pain, not an emotional, a physical pain.  I have moved to my divine feminine and to feel the rage, anger, shame move through me brought out great amounts of physical pain.  My spiritual mentor helped me clear many energies, as this was not fully clearing with me–my BeLoved also physically pained and not behaving like himself…It was too deep, too intense.  So, she cleared the way for me to submerge myself into the deeper waters going down, down, down.

Dreamtime work brought forth my answers, my shame, my guilt; the worst part what will happen when my BeLoved twin flame realizes what I did.  Will he hate me, will he fear me, will he banish our love?  The beauty and surprise were “My silly girl, I have known all along, and have waited to hear the truth from you.  Why did you fear me?”  My response, “Do you wish to hear our truth or do you wish me to lie to you as all the others that fear you?”  My BeLoved, “Truth, and when did you ever fear me?”  My repose,  “One because of your mistake, you behaved in a way that was not like you; thus I made my mistake and I am ashamed of my mistake, I went into hiding, like a lost scared little girl and with each lifetime since have been put to death; deaths that did not belong to me, if I just shared with you–the truth. Now that I have come into my truth-I refuse to hide; my cloak of invisibility gone-I stand and shine my full glory of love and light for all to see!”

I have come to realize that the angst that created my BeLoved and my separation of this lifetime, stems from mistakes of centuries ago.  Spiritually, I have made amends with my BeLoved twin flame; I do not know have the knows of this lifetime and can only pray that his esoteric form can truly forgive me and accept my love, my light, my powerful high priestess self. For to know me is to love me.

Much Love and Light

Magical Blessings, Natasha

Blessed be the Crystal Children of the World

By Natasha Botkin  Crystal children angelTime will not stop forever.When did Time start and when will it end?

It depends on Time itself.

Time will answer back if every being in the universe tells it to stop.

Will it stop if everyone wishes it to stop from the bottom of their hearts?

This depends on all of you.

–unknown Crystal Child

Twenty-four years ago, I began my journey being a keeper of a crystal child.  I have been blessed twice over and am the mom of two crystal children.

To explain a crystal child is to know a crystal child.  They are all quite special and unique fostering the quality that sets them apart from the typical human esoteric form.  They have beautiful, large eyes that can make most uncomfortable.  Why is this true; it is like they are able to look right into your soul.  They do, they are.  In fact crystal children are quite intuitive; and yet, somehow, I was blessed with one in particular who refuses to admit to this fact.

Their auras shine with pastel colors. They are playful, then again they are like old souls for their age.  Often wondering why they are considered to be the odd ones.  In truth, they are not.  They are more true to their heart, their truth than most would suspect.  They may not seem as if they are interested; then upon asking them a question, one discovers that they had been in fact listening.  They sparkle with unconditional love, the way that the divine created us to be.  This causes them to be quite sensitive; they can feel others emotions.

Crystal children seem to have a difficult time being taught and struggle with teachers.  “Why does this person think they are teaching me, I already know it.”  One of my youngest son’s famous topics.  They live in the present ‘Just Be’ moment; something that is super important and be able to do.

I am going to step out a bit more.  Say something not routinely discussed about crystal children.  These dear souls are loving, kind, do not like confrontations and are usually misunderstood.  In fact, I just described an autistic child.  They are one in the same.  An autistic individual is pure, full of love, dislikes conflict, loves crystals, rocks, nature.  They are super sensitive to environmental changes.  Changes of any kind are difficult for them, why do they have to keep changing to keep up with what is ultimately so wrong.

Due to their open hearts, they seek out like-minded individuals.  Society saying that they are non-neurotypical and antisocial.  They do not like meanness; therefore why would they wish to join into society’s harsh critiques and manners.  They are of pure heart and soul.  They adore music, they know how to listen the music of their soul.  Crystal heart

To love one on the autistic spectrum is to love a crystal child.  However, these children are now growing into young adults.  As a mom it is difficult to view my older son’s struggles.  He is such a wonderful young man, and does not understand the norms or the politics of the workplace, society expectations. “What is wrong with people?” As my youngest is beginning to enter adulthood, I wonder what will happen for him.

Crystal Light ElderI wish to foster, address and guide these beautiful individuals.  Over the years, other crystal children have come to me in many different avenues. One day my higher self vortexes my insight, “You are a crystal elder. As you ascend into mastery, you become more crystalline. If you build it, they will come.”  What an absolutely beautiful gift to be chosen for.

I have the know of what to build and wait for the moment in time to hear “It’s time.”

Dear Crystal children you are so dearly loved and treasured.  Go forth and be the beauty that you are and help those around you; you have a wonderful insight as to the truth of light and truth of love.

Magical Blessings

Much Love and Light

Natasha

Please Be Patient, Under Construction

By Natasha Botkin 

Atlantis Waterfall

I recently saw this post somewhere “Currently under construction, thank you for your patience.” –unknown.  I am unsure as to the where this was posted.  Where it was posted does not matter.  What matters is the effect, maybe I am brave or immensely foolish to share this here, either way, during a truly difficult moment of outside sources plaguing me, I was trying to be the steady ocean; yet, the waves began to pummel again to me.

After hours of this, I reached out to a friend; who texted me don’t have a pity party.  Oh really, hmmm.  First, let’s define pity: the feeling of sorrow and compassion caused by the suffering and misfortunes of others.  So no pity party in fact, what caused me the duress was the images of my BeLoved (my Twin Flame) and all of our beautiful moments together.  Which lead to why doesn’t he wish to speak to me, the divine response was “fear, fear of you; if he has to accept you as you are, he has to accept his truth.  My dear you can be quite a bit for a weakened one, your powers are immense and ever reaching in ways that most cannot even begin to muster. Be patient dear one.” 

Then I hear, “Should we begin to pop the popcorn.” Oh so not, funny right now dear angels, my sense of humor flushed down the toilet and out to a rocky sea.  It takes me a bit to settle; the outside is pouring into me, others egos are crushing; seriously, check yourself before you wish to be all mighty, cause you’d be surprised at how some enlightened individuals behave.  Which brought me back to my human work as a behavioral specialist, and this helped me settle into my higher self, the blonde parts of my hair changing into the crystalline silver essence of Amel shining forward.  Oh Lord, if Amel is here with the angels, I know what is about to come, the elders of the realm, Mary Magdalene’s image and then Jesuah’s image and christ light expansion.  Fully being bathed in christ light, crystal light and the love that cradles me is beautiful beyond compare.

My ego barks, I just went through a re-birth, please not again. .  I have two choices, I surrender to this factor or I rage an ego battle.  Yep, I am in no way going to behave like my BeLoved; they warned him, he choose not to listen and now has the effects.  That’s the part that one should realize; we all have a destiny, we either go or they will give to us “free will,” and then steer us back on course.  Our course can be simple and graceful or it can be awkward and difficult.  Ultimately that is “free choice.”

My human form surrenders to the fact that I am about to undergo massive construction.  Do I know where this will take me.  No, I do not.  It is befitting that this is occurring at the same time as the new moon. In fact a very powerful new moon.  In truth, the divine love and light that surrounds me also helps propel me even further up the spiral.  It is now, that I am more aware that in order to accept this new growth, the old had to strip away to make room for the expansion of heart, holding space in a most auspicious way.  The being old patterns,old beliefs; they do not belong, they needed to go like a hole in a sock.  The toe pokes out and you think I’ll throw that sock away or darn it; darn it in thought and rip that sock off, cause the new one will be soft, simple, graceful.

Be Kind BattleAll I ask, is please be patient with others.  As we are all under construction.  In my last blog, patience was the divine ideal that shined forward.  Again this heralds true.  “Be patient dear ones, the best is yet to come; a soul knows no time.  A soul is timeless; it is human ego that places a time; disallow and breath, go inside, allow.” 

Much Love and Light

Magical Blessings

Natasha

Peaceful Ascension

By Natasha Botkin 

Recently as I drove down the road watching commuters battling out for a space in the line of traffic, I sat back and thought why?  Why does one cram themselves into a line that does not go much further than one car length.  This brought me back to a conversation with my spiritual teacher.  Steer the course, do not ver to the left or right.  A song plays over the speakers, the lyrics of a change, a battle, of peace….

Which brought me back to a moment, a moment of an exchange with a wise woman.  A stranger really to me, all of my life, I have people stop and tell me their life stories.  My children often asking why would a stranger tell me that?  I have just accepted that people come to me to tell their stories.  Sometimes, they need a wise voice of innate wisdom to shine forward without judgement, without conviction, a person to listen, to help them release this.  Satinglass spiral

This lady looked at me and said, “Wow an ascended one, I’ve never met one in person before and you look nothing like I would think an ascended one should look like.”  I remember looking at her and wondering, but not saying anything, as I knew she had a story that she would share; and what a beautiful story it was.  It wasn’t the story; it was what she said, this was years ago; “ascended, ascension; isn’t for  the faint of heart and it will take much energy, love and light dear one, be prepared as it will come and you will easily glide up the spiral.” 

At the time, I was preparing for a major divorce and custody battle.  Little did I know that was much easier than ascension.  My spiritual teacher will gently guide me, and yet the human psyche at first wanted the ego to rage, bark and scream.  Almost like a two-year old not being allowed to have a cookie before dinner.  Yet, this is going to happen, go with grace and it will come with ease.  Some has been filled full of ease, and some would be easier to deal with a two-year old having a tantrum.

Come back to peace, love and light.  In steps the next wise woman, I am walking in the store and ran right into her.  She remarks, “Darlin, get your head out of the clouds.”  I look her, smile and say,“Ha clouds, that too easy, try galactic travel or what dimension did I float off to, traversing the mundane of today’s humanistic mess.”  She smiled and replies, “Ascension is not easy, especially in the modern ways.  You do not look like one, so many may not even realize. It’s not the appearance; it’s the light, the love that matters.” 

I am a special education, so I am a pro at what is called “wait time.”  Well, I am a pro with others, “wait time,”  me well in truth, I am not usually a slow learner, and  yet, may need an accelerated IEP to slow my horses, so to speak. (As my spiritual teacher often says, “Dear the Aries in you.”)   I look at her and wait, she smiles a big grin and says, “Dear one, you are doing much better than you give yourself credit for; however patience is necessary. The biggest patience that you need is your own transformation to ascension. you are almost across that bridge to a major level up, be patient.  Years ago, you were told that you do not look like an ascended one, in truth, you’re a more modern version. Your spiritual mentor has recently given you knowledge of the changes that will come.”  Then she smiles and says, “Be Kind, Rewind,” and instance is gone, I look around the aisle and do not see her.

Slowly, I approach the checkout; barely able to speak to anyone, and yet like moths to the light people dance around me.  I pay for my items and sit in my vehicle.  No thoughts, nothing, just sit and allow the wisdom that was also downloaded settle and absorb into my light.

The latest wise woman, was the same week as recent the crystal light activation January 2015, the full moon and just after the winter solstice.  It has taken me a bit to settle into the next step.  One moment, I am walking in the divine feminine goddess of innate wisdom that heralds the divine wisdom of love and light; and the next I am submerged in a hot bath trying to release the negative energies that seems to want to invade my aura.

And in truth, I do not wear flowy robes, probably never will. I am more of a mover. singer, dancer with the heart of a youth filled full of love and light. Hence the comment “Be Kind, Rewind.” Go back to my heart, my joy, my peaceful grace.  One thing that has come about with the crystal light activation is peace, harmony and joy.  We need much more of it.  If ya feel like dancing, dance; if you feel like singing, sing.  Life is to be lived and enjoyed with a beauty that is deep within us all.

Magical Blessings of love and light!

Natasha

 

Crystal Light Activation

by Natasha  Botkin 

Crystal Light Elder

January 3,2015, there was a crystal light activation that entered Earth’s atmosphere.  Those who can see, hear, feel at first wondered what had happened.  We just celebrated the new year, preparing for the full moon and what is happening.  My ascension and sensitivity went to an extreme.  I felt like I had been literally punched, my face, my jaw, my skull ached; the masculine seeping, weeping as it leaving me.

Here comes the full moon, the intensity settled, yet I could feel something brewing just underneath.  My vibrational manner changed.  I cried at a drop of a hat, worst of all unable to shield my empath ways, taking on and absorbing so many negative energies.  Others around me who are also sensitive were also affected, many of these individuals crying, unsure as to why.   The most difficult moments, how do I explain this unknown, especially when the unknown are children?

I felt my heart space expand and grow even more.  People would say,”Did you know that your crystal is glowing” or they would look away not wanting to admit to what they just witnessed.  My heart had the most tremendously, wonderful energy pulsing through.  The harmonics grew, those who have ascended are growing, opening, preparing for the next wave.  This is just the beginning to a new wave, a new way, more heart, more grace, more love, more light, more peace.  Crystal light heart

If you are one of those who are effected, please seek solace from those who can and will support you.  This is absolutely beautiful, and necessary; yet it can leave one overwhelmed. Enjoy something that brings you joy.

Much love and light to you!

Magical Blessings

Natasha